A Decolonizing Space to Reflect On and Learn From Failure
Sharing all the moments that I have been wrong and have myself been wronged.
Hi friends,
Last year, I started a blog dedicated to failure and I want to return to it here today.
As I’ve been delving deeper into this work around equity and anti-oppression, I’ve found myself working with more organizations and businesses that are looking for ways to build more inclusive and equitable practices in all aspects of their operations. I’ve worked with them in different capacities – as a consultant, as a facilitator, and as a presenter.
What I have found working in this space is just how reticent people are to honestly and openly engage in these difficult conversations. People are all too often afraid to speak up for fear of saying the wrong thing, of making a mistake, of getting “cancelled”.
Dr. Anu Taranath, a facilitator and educator specializing in issues of diversity, racial equity, and social change, calls these moments “overdetermined” – that is, moments that suffer from too much expectation, high-stakes moments that must solve every issue, that are the be-all and end-all. Moments that are, frankly, impossible. Just think of your lunch-and-learns during Black History Month or Asian Heritage Month or whatever other commemorative month dedicated to a minority group. One hour that is supposed to “fix” your company’s diversity issue.
We live in a society that does not readily engage with complexity or nuance. We live in a society that wants quick fixes and easy answers. A society of binaries and absolutes where you are either right or wrong, and there is no in-between.
And that is at the heart of the issue here. We cannot keep operating with this kind of mentality. We need to dedicate more time and create more spaces where we can have sustained and continued conversations that are challenging, complicated, and uncomfortable. We need to practice having these conversations that help us build our capacity for learning, that leave us feeling stretched
In short, we need to create more spaces where we can fail without judgment. We need to create space where we can fail and take accountability for those failures with a community that cares for us.
Seeing this aversion to failure, I wanted to lead by example and share my own mistakes. That’s why I created ‘I Was Wrong(ed): A Decolonizing Space to Acknowledge, Reflect On, and Learn From Failure’.
I want to hold space for these precious and painful moments that have been so fundamental in shaping who I am today. I created this space as a way to move beyond the discomfort of failure in our conversations around social justice and anti-oppression and instead, normalize failure in our discourse. I’m writing these stories as a way to hold tenderness and compassion for an older version of myself who did not know better, but who knows now and is still continuing to learn and unlearn.
Over the next few months, I’ll be publishing more essays about these critical moments when I have been wrong or that I myself have been wronged. This will be an ongoing project as I continue my learning and unlearning journey. I’ll probably be wrong along the way. And that’s ok. I welcome the opportunity to learn from these mistakes so that I can do and be better. Hopefully, you’ll welcome those critical opportunities in your life too.
In solidarity,
Justine
What’s happening in my world:
I just finished an excellent course by the On Canada Project, in partnership with Equal Futures Network, called “Designing Digital Dialogue: Communications for Systems Change”. The course aims to go beyond the traditional inclusivity trainings to bring a Justice, Equity, Diversity, and Inclusion (JEDI) approach to how we do our work in the social impact space, starting with creating meaningful online communications. If you’re interested in taking the course on behalf of your organization, reply to this email and I’ll hook you up with a discount.
Living Hyphen is working with the On Canada Project for a storytelling project for newcomer, refugee, and racialized youth where we will be exploring, capturing, and archiving our nuanced stories. If you know folks who identify as a newcomer, refugee, and/or person of colour between the ages of 18-25 living in the Greater Toronto Area, and who are interested in sharing their story of living in between cultures – please share this opportunity widely. It’s a paid opportunity!
Living Hyphen just added a number of new creative storytelling workshops for the spring season! From collage art to zine-making, from embodied writing to playing with emojis, we are so excited for our most playful workshop season yet. Register now.
This past weekend, I had the honour of moderating a Q&A for Riceboy Sleeps with writer and director Anthony Shim and lead actor Ethan Hwang on the TIFF stage. This film captures the immigrant experience with such tenderness, complexity, and truth. It dares to speak aloud so much that our Asian-Canadian communities (and immigrant communities, in general) struggle to articulate because of the ways we have been conditioned to survive in the face of colonization and systemic racism. It explores mental illness and grief - all while also holding joy and lightness. If you haven’t seen it yet, check it out now.